This one is for sorting out my thoughts, not comments, though they are welcome.

I know it's been a while since I've posted. I guess there's just a lot going on. With graduation coming up, I've been thinking a lot about the future. First off, it's crazy to think that I'll be graduating in less than a month. I feel like it wasn't so long ago when I was in junior high going through the same things little sister is now. No matter how excited I say I am for graduation, I'm just as scared. Right now, it's not in a bad way. Hard to explain.

I've been thinking a lot about this place lately. And I know it's expensive. And I know it's far away. And I know I'm probably getting in way over my head when I say I want to go there. I know all these things. But I can't help it. The second I laid eyes on the brochure 2 years ago, I fell in love. And ever since then, it's been bouncing around my head and because I've always thought it was so out of reach, I pushed it away. Recently it's been brought up for reconsideration and it's all I can think about. The mere idea of this school gets better and better every day to me. I can't help but wonder what it would be like, who I will meet, what I will learn, and all the many adventures I will go on.

My wondering mind seems to get the best of me sometimes. I can't afford not to know. I'm a very curious person. Yes, I am a home body. I'd rather stay home, or close to, on the weekends. I never was much of a party-goer. Having said that, there's this whole other side of me. I'm not quiet, I'm a listener. I'm not shy, I'm an observer. I'm not timid, I'm... curious. I want to embark on a great adventure, as cheesy as it sounds. I really do. It's just something I want. Explore.

No matter how afraid I am of graduating, moving away from home, making these huge decisions; I'm ready. I was serious when I said this and I'm serious now. If I'm going to do something with my life, make it an adventure, why not start now? In fact, if I don't start now, I don't think I ever will.

And if I don't make it to this school, at least I can say I tried my best and I won't have to wonder what could have been.

Song of the day.